One of my biggest life achievements is fighting the stigma associated with Female Infertility. Alhumdullilah, I consider myself blessed and fortunate, holding a degree in dentistry and working in one of the best institutions in Saudi Arabia. But then, a twist of fate that 10 years to my marriage and I was struggling with infertility, it’s a fight you not only fight with yourself but you have to fight it with the outer world too, it is sometimes very painful when people feel sorry for you, pity you as if you are an alien in the world.
I left no stone unturned seeking treatment for infertility, as I was facing secondary infertility which is treatable as compared to primary infertility. My doctor told me that I can conceive with IUI and IVF, and I went for it. The first trial that I took for IUI was a failure and so was with IVF, but I didn’t give up. I stood like a stubborn tree against the strong winds of my fate and I took another trial and Alhumdullilah it was successful and I was blessed with a baby boy but our society does not understand this and thinks that it’s not allowed in the religion. Some people consider those babies as test-tube babies, while others consider them as children of Satin. I didn’t fall prey to all this stupidity because I strongly believe that this treatment wouldn’t have been possible if it wasn’t for Allah’s will.
Also, I was diagnosed with a brain tumor though it was benign, not dangerous but it was causing a delirious effect on my body with extreme weight gain, high blood pressure, and repeated fractures, both my upper and lower limb suffered fractures. I faced all these just to prove that if Allah has made this treatment available for couples like us there is no way I will put it in brackets of halal and haram.
After going through all that, I started to counsel couples facing similar issues to go for Fertility treatment may be the issue is so small that can be resolved with IUI and at times the issue is not in the females, its the Male sperm count and motility being the reason and ultimately you have to go for such treatment options. It should be emphasized that in our society only the female is held responsible for such kind of issues,90% of us hardly try to sort out that the Male defective factor might be the cause.
Nowadays, I try to give free counseling to ladies who are facing fertility issues and experiencing associated mental health issues too.
Giving someone hope and being a lightening star in the life of those who have lost hope, who are enslaved in the taboo and stigma of society and their egos, is one of my biggest achievements.
Alhumdullilah I counseled a few couples with whom I shared my success story and now some of them are enjoying their lives with their twins and triplets by Allah’s will.
Also, I would like to mention that I had successful brain surgery for my tumor and I am living a happy, healthy, and complete family life.
I read somewhere and it really touched my heart!
“Strong women aren’t born, they are made by the storms they walk through”.
By Afsheen Irshad